Tuesday, December 1, 2009

The Forgotten Father

I wonder sometimes, if America has forgotten the significane of the Father.  Kind of hard to imagine that anyone can forget their father, but I understand that not all of us have the same experiences.  However, since becoming a father nearly 10 years ago, its been pressed against my mind that being a father is imaginary to many, essential to all, but supported by few. 

In my case, it all began when I accompanied my then girlfriend to the doctor's office to confirm her pregnancy. There was no bathroom for men.  The nurse informed me that the building was constructed in the 1970's, a period when many men didn't come to the doctor with their loved ones.  How stupid is that? Evenmore, why would I not want to go and see my child? 

Later after delivery, I was ignored in the recovery room, asked by a nurse, who I was and why was I in the room.  Now in my situation, my daughter looks EXACTLY like her father; ME.  But who says everyone is smart enough to recognize that fact.  Sadly one of my emotional memories of the day including being so astonished that so many people thought I was absent, despite my being present thoughout the entire beautiful day. 

And so, as my story continues to spiral like a helicoptor hit in the side by a sniper along the militarized zone, my now former wife, who never had a father, as I am to my daughter, is sending the message to my daughter that DAD is just something, not someone. 

On the contrary, my mother had a lovely idea of her father.  Even today, at 66, she still lights up when she talks about her father.  I want my daughter to feel that same way about me, which sadly has never been the case for my ex-wife.  Like my mother, I have always been in-love with my father.  Though growing up with him was trying, since he abused alcohol for many years.  But I love my DAD.  I learned lots of things from him, even if the lessons were painful.  From my vantage point in each of these cases is the dependent variable of the mother.  It appears that part of the mother's role is to impart to her children how important the father is to the family.  Failing to do so, not only diminishes the effect of the father on his children, but also diminishes thier understanding and ability to become fathers or supporters of fathers themselves. 

In the Holy Bible, Peter explains that the husband is to the wife as Jesus is to the church, which ultimately illustrates their interdenpency on each other to survive.  In addition to their titles as husband and wife, under God's charge that we be fruitful and multiply, fathers and mothers we are bound to be.  As such, Peter's analogy should not be forgotten or its seriousness overlooked.  Fathers are to mothers as Our Father in Heaven is to his Church [the family]. 

While I admit that many fathers have walked away from their responsibilities as such, many others are being mischaracterized by the women we have loved and the Country which so routinely hails its founding fathers.  A bit of irony I suppose, but desparate all the same for the man who wishes to me more to his children from which he is much more likely to be seperated from.  In the African American community this has become an epidemic. 

While I agree that mothers are capable of raising a boy into a man, I advise that caution be the better guide.  What did she think of her father and what she didnt will not be within her son or daughter.

I've had a rough time today, seperated from my child for almost 10 years, 4 of which at the victim of divorce and blind justice.  With no recognized way to tell how I feel and how this calamity soils my child, I pray to God to help me and she as the rest of the world has all but forgotten the Father.

Friday, October 17, 2008

The President needs YOU!

While Barack Obama's election to the Office of the President of the United States means so much for the United States and world, he [as President] can do little to affect change without the "people" [American citizens].

As luck has it, the Constitution and our structure of a republican form of democracy protects us through a series of checks and balances. However, Obama's presidency offers a new way to view our beloved checks and balances. Instead of seeing them as way of solely protecting ourselves from the President, we must also see it is an opportunity to SUPPORT and HELP him fulfill the changes he aims to complete.

Our support to this President, similarly like that given to John Kennedy, must me significant. So, how do we do that, you say? The first thing we can do is VOTE! Afterwards, we should educate ourselves on the implementation of government, our rights as citizens, and then put our citizenry into action.

For your education, I suggest reading The Federalist Papers, by Hamilton, Madison, and Jay.

For your action, get involved at the local and state levels of government. Attend your local town/county/parish council meetings. I advise everyone to track the work of your representatives (both local, state, and federal), examine their records, offer your comments, and demand that he/she support the President. Track the work of the State and Federal representatives. Write to your representatives, attend meetings, and offer your commentary. Ask them...."How are you supporting our President?"

Challenge your Congress persons to not just hold the line, but lead their battalion of citizens toward the President's goals. Remember, Congress is elected every two years so much of the representative's time will be spent campaigning for the next election. If they aren't supporting the President, start all over again...and VOTE!

Thursday, September 4, 2008

My First Time In Bloggsville

Welcome to my very first post to my bran-span-kin new blog. As you can see, I've titled my blog "From Way In The Back". I came up with this phrase several years ago as a title for a book I'm planning to someday write. The title captures both where I've been and where I'm headed. It also alludes to the all important 360 degrees of life, how important it is to reflect, being thankful, and a zeal for learning new things. And finally, the title denotes the value of the grass root and common-ordinary, hard working folks that are the cement binding me to my family history.

I decided to begin blogging largely because I like to talk. I enjoy intellectual discussion, infused with passion and an eye towards personal growth. I feel strongly that learning is a lifelong continuum on which we (those who elect to do so) choose to stay on. I don't feel that we (humans) can ever know everything, but we can try.

I look forward to blogging and having you share your input on the variety of subjects I present henceforth. I hope that neither age, race, gender, education, political affiliation, or other difference or similarity we may have will prevent or restrict your contribution to my blog.

I'm an eclectic in every sense of the word. You should expect to find the subjects of my post to have great breath.

I hope you enjoy